Vinter Vonderland

We had a pretty healthy storm over the weekend, starting off with some rain and ice mixed with sleet and hail at times, and turning into a snowstorm that topped off around 9 inches. Broken trees, power outages, etc. But some beautiful pictures did come of it. A few samples:

Vinter Vonderland

Symantec Customer (dis)Satisfaction Survey

The following is a text form of a survey that Symantec asked me to take (automated request from their online systems no doubt) after bludgeoning me nearly senseless during an experience that started out badly, and spiraled downward from there. I've put the text from the survey in red, and added commentary of my own in italics in case you haven't or don't care to read the related posts...

Possible Answers:

A. Very Satisfied

B. Satisfied

C. Neutral

D. Dissatisfied

F. Very Dissatisfied


1. Responsiveness to your issue - F

- The closest thing your support people could offer me to a satisfying response was a refund for the unused days on my subscription. $50 x 283 / 365

2. Professionalism of support personnel - C

- "John", who was obviously working a support desk from India, was, for the most part, courteous. When I explained just how ridiculous sounding his offer to add my remaining 283 days to another subscription to their products when I renewed was, he started off his response with something to the effect of "Sir - you're not listening to me". Can steam literally come out of one's ears?

3. Technical & troubleshooting skill of support personnel - F

- There was nothing technically helpful about John's responses. And the response for my problem was VERY slow. I waited an additional 10-15 minutes on the line for John to come up with a response for me. This was AFTER waiting about 30 minutes on their so called "Priority" call in line after entering the priority number I obtained from their website. I blame their computer network as I think he was waiting for screen refreshes much of the time. I further suspect he was navigating the very same unhelpful online information that I had already gone through before calling him - that SUGGESTED I contact technical support, actually.

4. Communication & status of issues - C

- We didn't waste any MORE time by trying to wade through any technical solutions - so at least John realized that there were none to be had and we got right to the shouting...

5. Time to resolve issue - F

- Spending over an hour on the phone waiting on hold and having my problem "resolved" in this manner? This should have been discernible online - and should have taken 5 minutes tops.

6. Overall satisfaction with our performance - F

- yeah, right...

7. Additional Comments:

When your software corrupts my startup file and causes a crash requiring a rebuild of my computer, along with a reinstall of Norton, and I am unable to re-apply the product code I paid you $50 for, and the only options I am offered are "to purchase an additional year of subscription" or "to get a refund"... there is NOTHING satisfying about that customer experience. I'm taking my refund and I'm uninstalling Norton and going with AVG. All my knowledgeable computer friends consider it superior anyway (not to mention that it's free for home use).


8. Quality of product - F

- Crashing and then corrupting my windows installation in the process is a flat out failure as a product. Not doing ANYTHING remotely helpful to solve it aside from issuing a refund is a flat our failure to recognize your failure and shows that your company has no intention of remedying the horrifying enedmic problems with your software products. This is a failure as a company.

9. How has this experience influenced you to recommend or repurchase Symantec products - F

- I am now Symantec/Norton's number one anti-evangelist. As evidenced by the fact that you the reader are seeing this. Where ever you are seeing it.

10. Additional comments on quality of the product:

Crashing during an update, corrupting my startup file in the process, advising me to restart, and only then finding out that you've corrupted my windows install such that I must now spend the next several hours recovering my machine was only the beginning of a very dissatisfied experience for me. I assumed that given the circumstances you would want to do something to make it right. Instead, the customer support I received only made my experience worse - and created an anti-customer for life. I'm sharing my experiences with everyone I know and asking them to stay away from your products for their own sake. It's not worth the aggravation. Might as well use AVG - which is free - and avoid customer support all together rather than expose themselves to your sad excuse for products and services. Also - being told that I should call back and verify that my refund was honored, while perhaps an effort on the part of the phone support person to insure that I received it, was, at that point, only icing on an already awful cake for me - and only served to further erode my opinion of your company and it's products and services. Do you guys do ANYTHING right?

11. How many times did you contact Symantec support to resolve this issue? - 2

- Once to be told that the best they could do to make me happy was give me a refund, and a second time to insure that I actually GOT the refund (on the advice of the phone support person).


Note that after entering my information, I was taken to a screen saying the following:

Symantec Survey

Your survey has now been completed and saved. Thank you for your feedback and for choosing Symantec.

Pretty durn presumptuous of them, don't you think? We're gonna need a new definition for the word "choosing" to make this statement even remotely appropriate.

Symantec Chat-Rant with Kevin...

The following is a transcript of a chat session I had with my brother Kevin shortly after having a negative experience with Symatec related to their Norton Internet Security 2006 product:

NOTE: It is a chat, so beware the occasional non-linear nature of the conversation as we ask and answer questions across each other...

12:45 PM me: AAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH

!

12:46 PM Symantec is the worst company in the freekin world!

9 minutes

12:55 PM Kevin: I'm not so much on their software theses days. Kind of a gut thing, but seems like they're severely bloated and really bog down performance. I was sorry to see Google team with them for the AV component of the Google Pack.

12:56 PM

me: From what I can tell - they are severely screwed up in every facet of being a software company

and believe me - I know from whence I speak...

12:57 PM Software, installation, online help, technical support, customer care, user interface, attention to customer satisfaction

12:58 PM those are just the things they have screwed up for me - thinking off the top of my head without really trying

Kevin: whoof - they probably have a crappy spam filter too ;0

me: I lack any faith in them at all at this point

actually - I'm glad it happened

12:59 PM Kevin: 'cause you have somebody to vent yer vinegar at no?

now?

me: if this is any indication of how well their software protects me from threats, I'm better off switching anyway

Kevin: Good point. Actually, I think they get decent marks for that.

me: It sounds made up

how?!

they can't do anything else right?

1:00 PM my sob story, I mean - sounds made up

Kevin: AVG free is a decent AV package.

Oh - so there's a fun story to go along with all of this?

me: absolutely....

Ahem.

It all started about a month ago...

1:01 PM it was late one night and Norton was busy doing an update (unbeknownst to me).

Suddenly, a message pops up informing me that Norton needs to shut down for unexplained reasons

I'm advised to restart my machine

which I attempt to do...

1:02 PM but the startup file has been corrupted (almost definitely by whatever Norton left unfinished when it crashed during it's update)

So I have to spend hours partially rebuilding/recovering my machine to get it back near the state it was in when Norton exacted it's last "protective" act on my computer.

1:03 PM I essentially went through a lot of the outof the box startup first time the customer boots the machine stuff all over again

including the Norton AV stuff

1:04 PM It went into it's60 day trial

so I let it ride thinjking I'd figure out how to apply the Product Key I have to it later

a few days ago the 30 day nag warning starts coming up

so I think to myself - lets jump on this and get er done

1:05 PM Kevin: YEAH! Get 'er DUN!

me: so I take a look and eventually find a dialog that looks like the place to re-enter my product code

5 fields

Kevin: D - U - N DUN

me: I have a 25 character product key

I start to enter it

BUT!

1:06 PM each field only accepts 4 characters before booting me to the next field

Kevin: oops - no HTML allowed. (still reading/listening)

heh heh heh

symatec sux!

me: so that by the time I've entered 19 of the 25 characters, I'm three characters into the last field

it won't let me enter character 20

but never mind cause I'd still have 5 more to enter anyway

1:07 PM I check the website - the faq - nothing useful or even remotely pertinent to my problem

I finally go down a route that recommends that I contact technical support

1:08 PM Kevin: 'cause you hadn't really entered Hell Proper yet, just the ancillary rings of despair.

me: I get a so called "priority code" from the website, which asks me for some information, including a description of my problem, and presumably will get me right through to someone who can help me

1:09 PM It claims that using the priority code I should have my problem resolved in 15 minutes

I smirk - but go ahead and dial the number anyway

THIRTY MINUTES LATER...

a guy named John from a call center in Bangalore India answers my call

1:10 PM I tell him my situation, hoping he can direct me to some dialog that will allow me to re-enter my product code (that I payed $50 for).

1:11 PM I give him my code - I give him several other numbers and codes from the e-mail I got back when I made the purchase...

I have been pleasant, docile and humble up to this point...

now I wait as he fumbles around trying to figure out what's up

1:12 PM I can hear other "Indian Johns" in the background dealing with people over the phone

sometimes I hear him turn on the mute (probably plotting just how to best wind me up with this next round of interactions...)

Finally he comes back to me with the good news.

1:13 PM I'm sorry sir - but what you have is a renewal code. You cannot use that to activate a downloaded installation.

?!

1:14 PM Ok - what do I do then." I ask politely, still naively thinking there's going to be some customer pleasing way around this

1:15 PM And this is what he says - "you will not lose the 283 days you have remaining on your subscription"

when you purchase another product, you will get these days added onto your subscription"

1:16 PM so when you purchase another year of subscription for one of our products - you will actually get 1 year 283 days of subscription for that product

Kevin: so, for an additional $50 you can pick up a new subscription of our God-forsaken software and make it last for the better part of an additional year, that your sojourn in Hell can be fully and completely realized by yourself.

me: Remember how I talked about being polite and stuff before?

Yeah... that pretty much ended right here

Kevin: Did you create an International Incident?

1:17 PM India does have a pretty comprehensive military machine you know.

me: I started off with "That's not acceptable"

Kevin: reasonable, if naive :)

me: and "why would I pay you money to fix a problem that your software caused?

1:18 PM you can tell me how to activate my software for the remainder of the year and IF things work out, MAYBE then I will renew my subscription

Kevin: "Why Would You Pay?!"

me: But I have to tell you - right now, it's not looking too good

1:19 PM so he pauses a bit...

Kevin: (sing it brotha!)

me: probably updating the scripted screen on his computer from - "Normal Response" to "Now we've really pissed him off!""

1:20 PM First he asks me to listen to him (indicating hes NOT listening to me)

then he says - you have two options

you can purchase more software or get a refund for the 283 days

I say - That's it? That's all you can do for me?

1:21 PM I go off on a tirade about how badly they treat customers, how much their product sucks, how may places I'm going to go and tell others about how badly their software sucks, and....

1:22 PM (really meaning their company sucks)

but I forgot to tell him he should get work at another company if he doesn't want to field rants from irate customers forced to put up with their crap...

1:23 PM But wait. There's more...

Kevin: "ahem - If you could just listen to me sir you would realize that you have two options."

me: Naturally I take the refund option at this point as I plot how to best use that money to expose them for the villainous cowards and deletante's they are

1:24 PM so he takes my info so he can send me a check which will arrive in 20-25 days.

Kevin: what's the refund amount to?

me: 283/365 x $49.99

whatever that works out to

Kevin: Ah, so a linear amoritzation.

1:25 PM me: BUT here's the final kicker

He tells me that I'll need to call back in a day or two to insure that my refund get's processed properly

because sometimes they fall through the cracks

or something to that effect

1:26 PM Kevin: A refund might fall through the cracks? You're requesting a refund because you are dissatisfied and they care about as much about getting it processed as they do about... I dunno - something insignificant?

1:27 PM me: so just in case I'm not mad enough at them yet to really disengage me and turn me into a non-customer and anti-evangelist for their rotten company...

for life...

1:28 PM I'm now expected to prove I really want a refund by calling back, sitting through the 30 minute "priority caller" wait period, and talk to "anyone here will be able to help you with that"

1:29 PM probably to give them a chance to try again to persuade me to spend some money on the products their shitty company peddles in their pursuit of greed and evil

1:30 PM And - which means this isn't really the end of the story yet since they get one more chance to make the experience even worse than it already is

1:31 PM Now - to go back, grab this rant. clean it up, edit it a bit

and post it in as many places as I can find that it makes sense to do so

1:32 PM Kevin: Todd - that sounds crappy. No wonder you're ticked off.

1:37 PM me: Yeah - guess this isn't just me getting immersed in my tendency to go off

51 minutes

2:28 PM Kevin: hey stirred one?

2:29 PM me: yo

Kevin: nuttin' - haven't nuked Bangladesh have you?

2:30 PM me: I don't think Symantec is an Indian company.

I'm coherent enough not to direct the full force of my wrath at the call center

2:31 PM Kevin: glad that you're distinguishing between Symantec and the outsourced support team... actually, you were clear about that throughout your rant.

2:33 PM me: Hey - did you see Brian's e-mail about getting together tonight?

trails off into unrelated discussion...

Symantec & Norton Tools - Tops in sucking...

A few days ago, I had probably the most completely dissatisfying customer experience I think I have ever survived. I'll provide a summary of said experience in a minute. But in order to provide you with the opportunity to enjoy the same completely ungratifyingly crappy software and service experience I got to have, but without going through the inconvenience of becoming an actual Symantec (Norton software) customer, I've posted the chat exchange I had with my brother following the first interaction with their technical support, and a little write up containing the survey Symantec sent me to fill out, complete with my answers and some additional commentary.

For those unfamiliar with Symantec, they own, develop, distribute, and support Norton Anti-Virus tools. Or at least that's what one imagines they attempt to do based on the business they claim to be in. At any rate, I became a customer of theirs last fall after purchasing a brand new HP computer that came with a 60 day trial copy of Norton Internet Security 2006.

At the time that I originally purchased and set up the computer (an HP Pavilion Media Center system with a TV tuner and a nice 21 inch flat screen), I happened to be on staff at the local university lecturing for a class on software for engineers offered during fall semesters. So I had a choice of installing the freely available university anti-virus (AV) software, or of trying out the 60 days of free Norton AV software. Since I already had the university supplied software installed on a different computer, I decided to give the Norton suite a try so as to make some kind of comparison and see if I could tell which one was the better product. Since it was November by the time the 60 days passed without incident and I wouldn't be on staff at the university after the first of the year, I went ahead and laid out 50 bucks to upgrade to a 1 year subscription.

So without further ado, here is a short sweet summary of my misadventures, which does nothing to communicate the gross malfeasance perpetrated by Symantec, to say nothing of the frustration they caused me, but which goes something like this:

Norton crashed during an update in early January 2007 and had to shut down. Upon shutdown it advised me to restart my computer. Norton's aborted update attempt left my startup file corrupted, which I didn't find out until attempting to restart my computer. At which point I entered into a Windows XP recovery process lasting several hours - into the early morning. As part of the recovery, I got to reinstall Norton, which returned to it's original 60 day trial period. I left upgrading it until later. After 30 days, it started nagging me to renew, so I dug up the product code I had received when I originally purchased the upgrade. But I could not figure out how to get the designated screen to accept the 25 character product code as it seemed to be expecting a 20 character code. After digging through the online support information I was eventually advised to contact technical support, which I did, spending over an hour to get about 5 minutes worth of information. The only option I was offered initially was to purchase an additional year of support to which my remaining 283 days of remaining subscription time would be added. Upon losing my temper, I was offered a refund option, which I took. But was then told I'd need to call back in 1-2 days in order to confirm that my refund was processed properly.

So that's the SHORT version - but as promised, here are some links to such documentation as I have available to assist you in sharing my level of ire with Symantec, their products (Norton), and their customer service:

Chat-rant with my brother later the same afternoon after my first interaction with live technical support: Chat-rant-against-symantec...

Text version of the survey Symantec sent me to fill out online after my customer service experience (with commentary added by me): Survey in text form...